Silver Rain Faery

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Copyright, Silver Rain Faery

In a split second, sitting on the shower floor
I contemplate my despression
It likes rock bottom, it steals the ability to cope with everyday things and gets so
Extreme it makes even the good in my life unbearable
Trapped in a prison of fog, stumbling in the shadows with a light
infecting every cell and fiber of my being
There is no light at the end of the road
Only the endless darkness that wraps me
In its eternal spiderweb
Tortured with memories of regret, guilt and pain
Like a disease, it thrives in the abyss of my negative mind
Where sad and confused feelings haunt my thoughts
It hates my little blue pills
They slow down its progress towards total hopelessness
It’s too late for help
No one can wake up my shrouded depressed state of mind
Or so it makes me believe

It likes to make me think I’m getting better
Then it likes to slither up and strike with its venom of cruelty, pain and lack of hope
It likes to make me wake up in the morning afraid to move
It tunnels its way throughout my body to make me immobile
Twisting my last shred of hope
Blowing out the flicker of light left
All that’s left is the cold and the pain
Then, a high pitched laugh occurs when it wins
When I feel myself give up, the last bit of my rope unravels and
I fall into the black cavern of my Hell.
Blood dripping off razor blades surround me
Syringes dripping with saving heroin hang above
And bullets taunting me fall all around as shiny gold rain
The sky is red
The clouds weep blood
This is my home, where I feel I truly belong
When I’m there, I can explain exactly what it is
IT is the complete lack of hope, IT is despair and pain at its greatest moments
Where nothing and no one can save me…
Except me

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