Rhiannon
Cutting
Copyright Rhiannon
You tell me I cut to die,
but I tell you I cut to live.
To know that in some way
I can still feel.
Being numb for so long
and knowing in some sick twisted way
that I still have emotions.
Even if it’s only pain and anger
and sadness… and hurt.
The crimson river flowing
and all my problems flowing
away with it.
I knew you would never understand.
I couldn’t make you.
Cutting to live, to feel,
not to die.
I couldn’t stop myself.
It was like a fine wine,
like an addiction
I couldn’t beat.
Nothing helped,
nothing stopped the pain,
except the red tide.
Like a silver snake
kissing the skin.
Skin gently parting beneath
cold metal.
Not cutting to die,
but cutting to live.