Emna

Anorexic Cutter

Copyright, Emna

I dragged the razor across my skin and watched the layers of blood run so thin.
The pain started to take over me,
pushing aside all my memories.
I Made sure the door was locked and that I was away from everyone else,
then I cut deeper.
Lying here so numb with such feeling of despair.

I can’t control myself,
I can’t cry it all away.
So I bleed, I bleed just to live for one more day.
streaks of blood across my arm,
these are the tears I cry.

I hear a knock at the bathroom door,
frightened, I drop the razor to the floor.
‘come to dinner’ My mother yells,
I rolled down my sleeve, no one could tell.
Picked up the razor from the floor,
cleaned up the blood and unlocked the door.

I sat down at the dinner table,
Hoping that I will stay stable.
My mind, it tells me lies about the food in front of my eyes.
‘I’m not hungry’ I said as I pushed the food aside,
She couldn’t tell that I lied.
Walked away with a smile,
My disguise.
No one could tell about the scars carved across my thighs.

I couldn’t control myself,
I couldn’t cry it all away.
So I bled, I bled just to live for one more day.
streaks of blood across my arm,
these are the tears I cry.

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