Dark-Chi
Random
Copyright, Dark-Chi
Abnormality of the mind,
Running in circles, leaving no trail,
Gone, only to pop up once again,
I cry, you laugh,
Dry hands, cold touch,
Shivering this much,
Leaning this way,
Falling that,
Blood is dry,
Begun to cake,
I can hear people cry out,
For goodness sake!
Nail polish chipping,
Teeth chattering, freezing with absent cold,
Inanimate pain, too much love.
Paper-Cup
Copyright, Dark-Chi
My heart beats within a paper-cup, Guarded by thorns, As the autumn sun mourns, No-one can get through, Except for maybe you… The thorns bleed my own blood, It’s overwhelming, Like a flood, Choking off my site, All is red, Even though I try with all my might, I cannot shake this feeling, This feeling that I must constantly fight, My freedom is just an illusion, My heart is breaking, so fast, so hard, My pain is their passion, My agony has come from a blank past, My heart beats within a paper-cup, Guarded by thorns, My heart is no longer free…
Self-Defeat
Copyright, Dark-Chi
i hold the blade,
asleep in my pocket,
just waiting to meet my flesh,
to taste my blood,
to use my skin as the canvas,
the blood as the paint,
itself, the blade, as the brush,
to make a a picture that soothes me,
people dont understand,
that those pictures are my screams,
my sanity,
my cries of,”why have you abandoned me?”
i know that it does not matter if you love me…
but if i love myself,
that wont happen,
as much as my spirt may dampen,
i curl on the floor,
cringing with self defeat,
they won…
all of the people who wish me ill,
who see the angry red lines and cring,
the puddles on the floor,
blood and tears…
Untitled
Copyright, Dark-Chi
i lie freezing,
never pleasing,
my tears wont stop flowing,
my heart is never glowing,
nevermore,
for i am frozen to the core,
and all i want is just to be free,
for me to see,
to feel,
but my heart is kept by a seal,
never to open to anything but blood,
no matter what i do,
i just keep coming back,
faking all the smiles,
to keep safe,
but im so cold…
why do i feel so old…?
all i want to feel is warmth,
but im so cold,
i dont want to feel so cold…
not forever
Untitled
Copyright, Dark-Chi
i am deprived,
of sleep,
i never have enough to keep,
of love,
with no-one am i a hand in a glove,
of hope,
i will never cope,
of sanity,
i have none,
i go crazy even in my sleep,
i look around me,
at my arm,
and see…
that i..me
am deprived…
Untitled
Copyright, Dark-Chi
theres an erie silence above my head,
and on the floor my body feels like lead,
and it wishes it was dead,
the things you say,
make me hold on,
but for what?
you wont be there for me…
will you?
…no…
dont hope for something that wont be there,
dont scare me,
im going back to the floor,
back to lead,
back to dead,
you should head back to the door…
Untitled
Copyright, Dark-Chi
i wish i could go back,
to fix it,
my “problem”,
but i cant,
i wish i could just sit,
sit and think about something other than the pain,
im sorry–
for making you worry,
for making you cry,
but dont worry,
i can act fine…
for you
Weak
Copyright, Dark-Chi
tears of scarlet run down my face,
there is no love,
for it there is no space,
no reason for it,
it only leads to pain and hurt,
suffering and blood,
love is evil,
it should die,
if only i could,
but i can’t so i cry…
because i am weak,
so weak…
Always
Copyright, Dark-Chi
The wind blows threw my soul,
the pain tears at my heart,
the tears pool in my eyes,
my wont cry…
on the outside at least,
but the inside…
is full of tears and pain,
i’ve covered it up so completely,
i’d like to see you try to see it,
but you wont,
i keep it inside,
locked up tight,
and kepted out of sight,
always…
always she’s locked up and out of sight,
always…
Cold
Copyright, Dark-Chi
why is the first thing i’ve felt in so long cold,
why not warmth,
please give me warmth,
just warmth…
not cold…
warmth…
please…
My Shoulders Fall
Copyright, Dark-Chi
heart hurts
pain works
dont fight
but i might
the night
sweet night
of hallowed light
My Shoulders Fall
Copyright, Dark-Chi
my shoulders fall like teardrops
as i am crying
so heavy am i sighing
i want to stand up tall
but how can i when i feel so small?
locked inside me when about
she yerns to come out
when alone, no-one cares
the one no-one can see
she lies so silent
she dies so forgotten
she wants people to know her
but the fake me wont show her
wont show the one who destroies herself
so i cry
my shoulders fall like teardrops
people see her but no-one knows her
but then whos writing these sad things?
whos sad song, that she sings
dieing
sighing
buying time
for nothing
no hope
my shoulders fall like teardrops
…as i cry
Untitled
Copyright, Dark-Chi
Life it sounds so simple,
people say it every-day,
people lose it every-day,
people use it every-day,
but me…?
me, i think that life is over rated,
full of pain,
what for?
the amusment of other people?
and life, others have it so simple,
why not me…?
why must i turn to that gleaming blade to help?
why, when i look around for help, cant i see, with vision blurred by all the tears?
why when i see the shimmering drops of blood in the sink, do i smile?
how can i cry and you laugh?
why do you leave me to die,forgotten and helpless?
why cant you help me?
you just leave…
why…?
Tears
Copyright, Dark-Chi
Tears, the pain of all that you hold in
Tears, the raindrops of angels
Tears, the hurt of betrayal
Tears, cold lonely nights
Tears, the fear of dieing
Tears, the aching need to end it all
Tears, the blood
Tears, the hate of everything
Tears, the anguish of my heart
Tears, the anger people instill
Tears, the things that block my heart and eyes from seeing
Tears, deluting the blood on my arms
Tears, just the fight to keep them back
Tears, weakness
Tears, i want them to stop
Tears, they wont stop
The most beautiful picture
Copyright, Dark-Chi
The most beautiful picture that you could draw,
is something that you cant draw with a paintbrush nor a pencil or pen,
its drawn with a canvas that is your wrist,
a razorblade is your drawing pencil,
so simple yet so hard to do,
you can end it all there or suffer under beautiful rubys of blood,
but all the same you can draw the most beautiful picture, with one line on your wrist,
with just a simple twist,
that wont be kissed,
you could draw it with a shiny knife,
or a dull peice of metal,
all the same the out-come came…
the most beautiful picture that cannot be drawn with a paintbrush nor pencil or pen,
the most beautiful picture that you could draw.
Life and Death
Copyright, Dark-Chi
life, full of desete
life, full of lies
life, brings tears to cry
life, sends people to kill your spirit
life, destroys all
death, could be my sancsuary
death, just around the corner
death, gleaming at you with wide hungery eyes
death, the relese that i look for
death, the end to all my troubles
death, singing softly to me
what would you choose?