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Allie

I Never Again want to Cry

Copyright, Allie

Sometimes I think theres something there
That maybe you could really care.
How wrong am I, you don’t want me
You want the little girl you see
I don’t want to feel this way anymore
I don’t understand what this feelings for
Why do people have to feel pain
What did they think we’d ever gain
The pain it runs so deap inside
It has wripped away all of of my pride
So I hold close to my skin the knife
Determined I shall take my life
I don’t want misery, I don’t want pain
I never want want to see another drop of rain
I want peace, an end to this black hole
I only want to rest my soul
Please don’t stop me, it’s you who brought it on
You’ll never miss me when I’m gone
You didn’t care when I was here
You didn’t care when I shed a tear
You didn’t care when I held the knife
Why should you care when I take my life.
So leave me be, let me die
I never again want to cry.

Cutting

Copyright, Allie

Everyone thinks I’m crazy
No one will understand
It’s not like I wanted to cut
It’s not like this was planned
The first day I cut
I smiled as I watched myself bleed
Now I do it constantly
Cutting is what I need
The tears I cried weren’t enough
Now the blood are the tears of my soul
Cutting really helps me
Cutting makes me whole
My anger and my guilt
Are bottled up inside
I might cut a little too much
There are too many scars to hide
People think I’m crazy
They think I’m insane
But they can’t see
Cutting relieves my pain
I’m never going to kill myself
I don’t want to die
Just because I cut
Doesn’t mean I’m saying good-bye
Call me what you want
I don’t really care
But if I couldn’t cut
This pain would be too much to bare
Just leave me alone
Cutting is a part of me
If I chose to cut I can
Because this is a free country.

The Cave

Copyright, Allie

The blood runs down the walls,
as she bangs her hands as she falls.
She is lening on the steel bars
as she craves into her arms.
Her razor is the only escape for her cell.
People stare at her but they can’t tell,
that there is anything wrong.
As she bleed she sings a sad little song
She now is on the floor,
the she hears a distance sound
childern’s laughter,
and this just making her saddder.
Her childhood was filled this sickness of others,
like father, sister, and older brother.
Her sister didn’t make it,
and she can’t take it.
Now she is older and still a messed up,
her parents think she so serwed up.
She thinkd she is too lost to be saved,
so she locked herself in this cave.
Her salvation lost long ago
so now she has nowhere to go
So she stays in her cave like the beast she is,
unable to forgive herself for what she did.

 

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