Meghan

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My name is Meghan. I live in Newark, Delaware and am fifteen years old. SI became a part of my life last summer (2004), when I was struggling with severe depression and an eating disorder (mostly bulimia, occasional anorexia) that I still fight to this day. I was hospitalized by my parents for a month due to all three problems, but primarily cutting because the severity of my cuts was progressing at an alarming rate. It will be a year I have been self-mutilation free July 25th of this year, 2005 (a little more than a month from the time I am submitting this picture). This is my worst, though I have other scars. Keep in mind this is a year old and was badly in need of stitches (which I refused), so it never healed quite right. It’s still tender when touched. It was severely infected soon after I did it, and I almost lost my entire leg because of it. The doctors expect it will be visible to some degree the rest of my life. A year later SI still controls my life. I cannot go the beach, swim, wear skirts/shorts/dresses or anything of that nature, not to mention I still get severe urges to throw away the year I have struggled to keep away from this addiction. It’s not that discernable, but when I cut I cut words and phrases. The one in the picture says “She’s not breathing”. Some other things I have written that are still visible are “Why am I so broken” on my lower left leg, and “Always defeated, never alive” on both of my outer thighs.