April
I have been cutting since I was eleven just about. The first time I cut, I was only eight. I had a microscope set that came with items such as tweezers, mirrors, and scalpels. I had felt a rush of depression for the first time. So I picked up the scalpel and made a one-inch cut on top of my arm. I had never felt so relieved and ashamed at the same time, it was madness. When I turned eleven and entered the 6th grade I was already going through my “dark years”, as I call them. I scratched my hands and arms with safety pins, it wasn’t too bad, that is, if you’re a cutter. Then I turned twelve and started middle school. Well, of course I didn’t know what horrors I was about to endure. Around November of 2003 I started cutting little one-centimeter cuts, they bled quite a bit and caused nasty scars. A little before my 13th birthday in 2004 I had the horrific urges again after I was supposedly “cured”. Yeah, right, OK. I took a safety pin to school and cut my arms fast and all up and down. I was placed in a hospital for a week, that was where I spent my 13th birthday, sadly. A while after I was released from the hospital I decided I was going to cut with a razor blade. I took it to school, stupidly, and was caught. I got suspended for the rest of the year, which didn’t exactly help my record any more than it was. I have a few pics from my recent and old cutting events. I’m still cutting, and yet, no one knows that I still do…
