Psyke.org

SamanthaB

I SI

Copyright, SamanthaB

My pain that’s built up I can not bear to handle. This life that i’ve been given is torture to me. Yet, I have my loving family and friends to live for.

What do I do when I don’t want to live anymore, but I have got to for my family and friends? I self-inflict. To release myself from life, to change my emotional pain to physical, to calm myself, to just feel better about myself, to feel real, to feel grounded in reality, and to stop my thoughts from consuming me.

I’m just overflowing with emotions that I having so much trouble expressing pains like sadness, depression, or anger.

I’m so full of intense emotional pain, but I have difficulty relieving the tension. This leads to me cutting myself. And by the time I’m done, it’s calmed me down and shown me I have control.

Then shortly later, it comes back no matter what, but then I’m already in a calmer state.

I have no intentions to kill myself. Please know that.

 

Permanent location: http://www.psyke.org/personal/s/samanthab