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Jaimie

To my Friend Kym

Copyright, Jaimie

My cure sits in my lap as he stands behind my back. They don’t have a clue. You wouldn’t even know if I didn’t tell you. But I did it for me. I wanted to see what it was like to be happy. I resort to the wrist whenever I’m pissed. I showed you but you don’t know how deep it really is. Stand in my shoes and you will see. You would do the same if you were me. I shut myself in my room. You think I’m safe, but just wait, when I get back I will be a differnt girl. You say blood makes you wanna hurl. So I keep it to myself. I try to stop but every day is hell so it’s back to the blade, another cut another day.

To Tabitha

Copyright, Jaimie

I did it again. What can I say. I feel this pain will never end. You tell me to stop every day. But without it I cannot mend. So tonight I start like most nights, the stainless steel against my wrist, about to cut to relieve my tention. But there is something else I did not mention. Because of you, I did not go through, in fear that you would do it too. It is weird how a friend that is new… can suddenly mean so much to you. So tonight ended differently. Can you tell your words had affect on me? Here I stand. A sharp object in each hand, but because of you, I picked the one that said No. 2. I chose to write, to end my night. Instead of a knife, to fix my life.

But Yet…

Copyright, Jaimie

What do you see when you look at me? Do you see my happiness slipping away? Can you see my memories that will forever stay? All you see are cuts on my skin. You don’t see the anger within. Don’t you see alone I stand? With the cold metal in my hand. Watch me as I walk in with tears and tight fists. Then leave with a slight smile and slashed wrists. From the outside looking in you see the scars on my skin. From the inside looking out, you see what I’m about. Do you hear what i hear? Listen to the quiet tears. They scream my fears. You do not hear my wish for death. But yet you love me above the rest, and you’ll be there untill theres nothing left.

 

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