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Holly G

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Copyright, Holly G

I have been cutting for about five years. I started cutting when I was in the sixth grade, when I met my friend Anna. She was a SI’er too. I met her because she saw me on the bathroom floor in the corner after school one day and I had blood running down my arm. The reason I started to cut was because of my mom. She had gone to jail that morning and my dad told me that she loved me and would be back soon. I’ve tried to stop a numerous amount of times, but I just get overwhelmed with feelings of abandonment and solitude and it slips. Recently I haven’t cut but once in about a month because the person I trusted most called social services. I am extremely conscious about my weight because I have been told I was fat ever since I was little. In sixth grade (when I started) I was thirty-seven pounds. I liked being that weight. I liked the feeling of being light. I feel heavy right now, I’m trying to diet but I can’t because everyone is practically shoving food down my throat and I’m not losing any weight. I’m trying to stop cutting but it’s really hard.

 

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