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Lonely
Copyright, Lonely
i am a cutter and a burner. threw my life i have been depressed and suicidal. i have always been depressed ever since i was little. no one really understood me. and it was sad and i felt really alone. i have always felt rejected from the world cuz i am different. people make fun of me for being adopted or because of my sexuality which is bisexual. its hard for me to cope wiht my problems. i am so lost all the time. as i was growing up my neighbor molested me and i never knew it was wrong.. and i never told anyone.. and it just got hard.i first started burning myself when i was in 6th grade.. i had a obsession wiht flames and fire.. and i just felt so alone.. life was so hard...and everything just got worse when i got in the 8th grade a freind of mine seuxually harrassed me and after that my life was shit... i smoked weed got drunk.. had sex.. got arrested.. and i cut myself like nothing else.. i jsut thought it would ease the pain i have inside... but it didnt i just got overly depressed all the time. and i would cut more and more.. by the time i got in high school. i was so suicidal.. and i was so alone.. for half the year of my fresh man year i was alone and had no freinds. i just felt so alone. as the year ended. i had 3 freinds. and during the summer i was smoking weed and drinking.. i got a boyfriend who said he loved me and me and him started having sex.. when my sophmore year started.. i was so fucked upin my head..that i lost 2 freinds.. they said i was crazy and had a split personilty.. i didnt care that i wasnt friends with them cuz they disrespected people. but inside my mind my thoughts werent right..and well its my the summer and school is gonna start and i am going to be a junior.. and right now i have no freinds. and no boyfriend and my self esteem is zero. my life is crummy.. and i still cut myself. cuz to me that is my only true friend. all i can say is people out there dont cut yourself. its not fun and it trully ruins poeples lives.. its ruining mine..